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| This is me when he had an opportunity to visit Center of Eco Living and Learning (CELL) in Silang, Cavite |
It is the end of School year and I’m glad that I already done with my paper works in my job and I’m ready to court a girl that I totally in love with. I text her in my cellphone that I will go to their house to express my desire formally. So as a preparation I take my bath, select a nice outfit, take the necessary things to do. I buy a dozen of donut, 3 liters of bottled cola and cute stuff toy.
But when I’m in their house disappointment and frustration appear. We had a nice conversation in texting her in my cellphone and all of the sudden she didn’t entertain me that much. After all of my preparation, it’s like an early Holy week. She didn’t tell me why, I don’t know what the problem is and I found out that he likes a Man who is rich, better-looking and not a teacher. She didn’t NOTICE and APPRECIATE my LOVE to her and how I SACRIFICE for the TIME and PREPARATION.
Why I use this kind of heartbreaking story of mine? To make you cry? or to make pity on me?
It is because this one event of my life suddenly sprouted after I read the article of George A. Ashenbrenner, a Jesuit on Examen of Consciousness.
In our life, God try and continuously court us in different situations in our day to day encounter But most often we see the bad side of life. The crucial part of it example your day is very stressful a lot of work to do, I break up with my girlfriend, my parents seems never like me etc. But most often we didn’t NOTICE how God is moving, touching and gently love us. We forgot small and simple events but Examination of Consciousness is a helpful exercise or it can be a prayer to articulate God loving message to us in every beat of our life.
As I quote “Examen gives our daily contemplative experience of God real bite into all our daily living” God reveal to us in such a moment that it touches our heart and make us feel better. This is a stage of life that we appreciate his love and care.
The first element is enlightenment and guidance to the Father allowing him to help us in our discernment for the whole day. It is also a manifestation that we are human that we need his presence and help in evaluating his moving graces.
It’s really strike me to this statement “Only the truly poor person can appreciate the slightest gift and feel genuine gratitude” In the second element of Examen it teaches me to be like a poor person. APPRECIATE little things in life, valuing small blessings and found out an everlasting Joy with the slightest light, blessings that only a poor person experience.
I remember an afternoon of July 6, 2011; I decided to walk around until I notice myself going to the Divine word Garden in Christ the King Seminary. The place is awesome; the scenery gives me a comfortable heart. It gives me happiness and the funny thing is I see tadpoles in a small pond and remember my childhood days that after the heavy rain, my cousins and playmates come and we go to our backyards and collect tadpoles and I remember how we laugh looking at tadpoles near in bamboo trees.
In that moment of looking my history, I thank God for that opportunity to brought me to this place to recognize his presence and LOVE. That simple scene in a day really touches me and God reveals his loving presence, it is not extravagant one but like a poor person this simple event is something special to both of God and me.
After the enlightenment and thanksgiving of the wonderful gifts of the almighty, it is the time to examen what happening to you in the different phases of the day.
I agree with the operative questions that Aschenbrenner said. We should ask yourself; what has been happening to us? How has the Lord been working in us? What has he been asking us?
I learned in praying that ninety percent of the time in praying is LISTENING. Perhaps we are too busy with our work and didn’t notice or observe our movement in a day but this third element of the examen trying to remember how God dealing with you. Awareness of How God works with you. It gives you a clear vision of the day where God trying to call you to make some changes and begin a new life with him.
I remember in that day also when I go the Divine Word Garden and ride a jeepney going to our spiritual year house because it’s too early to go home. I decide to myself to go the Seminary House in 42 Rosario Drive to play basketball. I see the clouds seem to pour out rain but somehow my mind and heart said to go on to my plan to play basketball but it seems that I feel coward because of minimal shower of rain that may cause a heavy rains and I might not play. But I fight my cowardness and be brave to go whatever happened and thinking that the Lord will take care of me.
In that event God telling me to be brave and trust him, he tells me to enjoy the rain, enjoy playing basketball, and enjoy my gift to you. It tells me to be relaxed, calm and ignore if I will going to be wet on rain afterwards. In this part of our consciousness examen God telling me to show braveness in all times because he knows his sheep and he never wants his sheep to be in danger.
On the final element of Examen, we have hopeful resolution in the future. As a quote in the article “We must be honest in acknowledging our feeling for the future… by hoping it will go away. This is a moment of asking the graces you need to the future to carry out yourself and be ready for tomorrow. Asking God to assist you in eliciting the events of our life that you need to make sure that you’re intimate relationship with the ALMIGHTY flourished and grow. It is also the time to pray his grace to make an intact communication between you and God.
I want to leave this reflection in a one event to relate the message that I learned through reading this article. Today, I started again to play Basketball and it is very frustrating that in my initial attempts I failed, but I notice myself that in giving my TIME in it I develop the art of shooting and dribbling the ball by regularly playing with it and it very helpful in your hearth and body playing this kind of sport. It is also applicable in Examination of Consciousness, regular doing this art of praying really help yourself in relating to God and also it may helpful in relating the hearts of others. God require us this as the prophet Micah said “To do what is just, to show constant love, and to live in humble fellowship with our God” (MICAH 6:8) May I find God and love him through this prayer and may I enjoy his presence and what he requires me to do in my life.
